Looking for a Man

My back is against the wall,

sitting sideways to the table

at a coffee shop

in a suburban strip mall.

A fateful word, heard not once,

but more, spoken by the woman in front of me

with unabashed certainty,

too stunning to ignore

Undoubtedly a first date,

arranged on the Internet,

two profiles with compatibility.

He, fumbling into conversation.

She, lying in wait.

He finally pops the big question:

"So what are you looking for?"

She reared back in her chair

and then she leaned in:

"I don't care about a man's size,

if he is fat or thin

or even if he tells me lies

over and over again

What I want is a man

I can monetize!"

He said, "Can you say that over again?

I must have mis-heard.

I am not familiar with that word."

Again she sat back

and then full steam ahead.

"Of course I'll be glad to repeat what I said,

because I do not want you to be mislead.

For me the man who wins this prize,

is going to be a man I can monetize!"

And then she sat back
and they both knew:
they were through.